Baby news?

"...It is the most fertile month, too, and could bring baby news..." LOL! I don't think so!

It's done

Just done something I wished I hadn't. Curiosity got the better of me...but we all know what that did. Just wished I could have left alone. Spose it aint that much of a secret. Why I'm blogging this I dunno...a way of making me feel better?

Crazy?

Came to blog and wrote it out, then wasn't gonna push the button, then did...

Not quite sure but I'm beginning to think I'm some kind of depressive or something. Everything can seem to be fine the suddenly I'm down again. It seems to go in a constant cycle. Nothing ever really seems to trigger it off, it just seems to hit me.

If you're reading this and really do suffer from depression I'm sorry, just saying how it feels to me and what happens.

Sometimes it can send me right down and this is when I feel the most emotional and, feel stupid for typing it, feel I need to let it all out and cry. Never do tho, summin stops me. (Think it sounds worse than it is). Other times it's not as bad and soon all passes. Never really let anyone know or in 'cos I usually just feel stupid, wanna try and sort it myself and don't see no real point.

Just having general coversations with some, this kinda seems how they can be. So I dunno if I need to worry or if I need to sort it some way. Prob me making more of it than it needs. Just been on my mind so thought I'd let it out.

I know this blog can often make me sound weird. That's part of the point of this blog, would rather place it all here than infict it on the people around me.

Dazzzzze

Been walking around for most of the day in a daze. Might because I'm tired so not with it. Might be 'cos I'm thinking about shit and didn't wanna be where I was. Been commented on quite a few times, not being my usual 'happy' self, so must be quite noticable.

Didn't expect stuff to be changing as quick as it is. Was a bit surprised first thing this morning. Think it's def a sign but not really paying much attention to it. Silly! When will I learn?

Reached one of those assessment points again. Still all much the same. Not goin down tho...but there again not really going up either.

Bump

Well I'm back. Been a really good week. Two trips away. Having a bit of a reality bump now after not really thinking for a few days. Always happens after a hol so hopefully not dwelling on it. Not so much a downer, just passing thoughs about what's gonna happen in the next couple of weeks and possible stuff I may need to do and sort.

Anyway...

Not gonna do great long boring accounts of the trips...

German rally was good. Despite all the airport/plane shite we got there with no problems. Got to see more than we all thought we would and drank stuff we probably shouldn't have.

Wish we could have spent more time than the 2(ish) days we were there. Was just getting back to remembering all the German I thought I'd forgotten and then it was time to leave. Hopefully be more opptunities to go to other places there anyway.



Then camping...Pevensey (Southcoast just outside Eastbourne). Another really good trip. Went alot better than I thought it was going too and hopefully all enjoyed as much as I did.

Crap pic but had the bonus of an air show. Was something different.

Explored the local air and saw castles, abbeys, beaches and stood at the edge of Beachy Head. Hopefully I didn't piss off everyone too much...well we're still all talking so couldn't have been that bad...or no worse than normal LOL.

Seems a bit odd now sitting here writing this, having been with others for basically a week and now not. Again another come back thing. Another thing not to linger on.

Nothing really

Thinking I'd better make a post seeing as I've ignored for a while. Prob had stuff to put on but either forgotten about it, so couldn't have been that important, or just didn't seem worth it.

Been a good good past few weeks...no thinking about it months. Not so much the weeks, more the weekends. Hopefully the next couple are going to be good aswell. A quiet one this week but all good, had a chance to recharge and sort stuff, still feel a bit dead tho.

Dunno why but feeling more positive and on top of things. Nothing seems to have changed but just feel better about it all at the moment. ?.

Well 'til next time laters. Thought I'd just check in.