Change

Well it's not as bad but I seem to be in one of 'those' moods. It's been ok the past couple of months but maybe because I've kinda had stuff going on or comming up. The past few weeks it's all been about the 'new you' and '50 things you need to change or you'll die' just being shoved into your face every 5 minutes.

I know to a point i've done that, but then they are the main things I know I need to do to prob get the best outta my life or at least make a change for the better. I suppose they are all mostly mental changes and to a point getting my personality out there. I'm kinda forgetting the physical side (am I making any sense?). I've probably never really talked about it to anyone apart from few sparse conversations about general stuff...oh and a rather drunk ramble about it a couple of weekends ago. Can't really remember much of what I said or what the answers were. Oh well

I suppose I'm just worried about the shallowness of the world we are now in. That includes me to some degree aswell. Many say they are not but in my experience there is some a small part of it in all of us. In some it's not their fault, it's just there as a hang over from our origianl design.

The big thing I've been pondering for the past couple of weeks has been about whether or not there is anyone waiting around on the path that my life is on. At the moment it don't seem it. Mostly my fault I admit. The more I walk on the lonelier it's getting. I've got frineds settling down, hell even getting married. I chat to people and it's 'I've been with so and so for x years'. It kinda just makes me wonder and think and sometimes have alot of self doubt.